As I posted previously, I was accepted into my first choice university, the University of Rochester. With that hurdle out of the way, my next concern was "How in the hell am I going to pay for this?"
My projected financial aid package for my freshman year came in yesterday, and basically I have to find a little over $11,000 to meet the cost of attendance. I would take the rest of it out in loans, but my federal loans were already at $7,000 per year, and I'd prefer not to be about $72,000 in debt after my Bachelor's degree. So after I looked into it a little more by talking to a current UofR student, I feel confident that I can lower that difference in cost some.
BUT (there's always a but isn't there?) it came to my attention that my family's financial situation may significantly improve once my mom graduates school in 2013, as she'll be getting a job (probably by 2014). What that means is that while my freshman and sophomore years may be all worked out, my aid for the subsequent years is going to disappear drastically. Is it selfish of me to want my mom to remain unemployed? Probably. However, I didn't make her life decisions that caused her to be this way, and because it's not my fault she's living this way, she shouldn't make me suffer in debt (or wallowing in depression because I can't go to where my heart wants me to go).
Then I did a little research on how to become a "financial independent," meaning the school wouldn't need any more financial information from my parents. It would maintain, roughly (if I'm reading into all of this right), that my aid would stay the same, and my mom can go do with her life as she pleases. But becoming an independent would involve more than just me, so that's something to think about. Or if Mom becomes as financially successful as she thinks, then she can take out the Parent PLUS loan that every other kid's parents do to afford college and take the burden off the student because that's what GOOD parents do. But anyway, yeah money's a big issue for me.
So today, I moved around kinda depressed and pissed off because I would rather die than go to UCF, and it clicked that if it's meant to be, it'll work out. And I realized how bad I want to go to Rochester, how bad I NEED to go to Rochester. And I remembered the MastersCard commercials that go something like "Bathing suits: $30. Tickets to the Bahamas: $2,000. Making once-in-a-lifetime memories: priceless." It reminded me that I'm only going to college once in my life, and I need to do things the way they should be. And I certainly didn't stay in IB just to go to a school I hate. I'd rather owe $150,000 (guestimation) and have an amazing experience that I can't get back than "save" money and be absolutely miserable. Then I opened my daily Dove chocolate and read the message inside (sometimes I do and sometimes I don't), and it said "Do what feels right." I've been in a logical vs. emotional, pros vs. cons tie for a long time about Rochester, and that little message of encouragement broke it.
And so, here I go.
Signed,
An (once I get the $800 enrollment deposit) Official Yellowjacket
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
Yellow Jacket Pride
Assuming you haven't seen elsewhere, possible readers, guess who got accepted into the University of Rochester! I cried, I really did. It was quite the experience. I found the packet last Thursday after school.
As pleased/delighted/overjoyed/amazed as I am about my acceptance, I'm torn between them and DePaul, which I'm sure I said before. Of course I'm in love with Rochester and everything about it, but there's just something about the unknown of the third largest city in the country that's pulling me in. Like TJ, I WANT that city experience. The "famous" Metro is right by campus, and pretty much all my favorite bands play either there or close to it. Not to mention I started my Chicago obsession at the tender age of 12. Almost NO bands play in Rochester, maybe Buffalo but that's an hour out, and heaven forbid they skip all that and go straight to NYC six hours away. I'd die. Isn't FOB supposed to come off hiatus soon? Because when they do, I'll have to be there, and I can't go if a concert is on a weeknight and it's in NYC. A weeknight show in Chicago? So much easier. But I can't get over that feeling I had when I stepped on the UofR campus that first day summer of 2011. Love at first sight is the closest thing I can say to describe it.
It's all going to come down to money in the end. I get my Rochester projected aid packet before the new year, and that will make or break my early decision agreement. If they fall through, then DePaul, by default (ha), becomes my top against UCF as far as money is concerned. Sadly as much as I want to, I can't go into the myUCF account and click "decline" on the admission status page. And why? Because of money. What happens if I decline them now, or in a few weeks, and either UofR falls through or DePaul simply doesn't offer enough for me to handle decent loans? I'd be drowning in debt...but do I care? I'd be stuck here for at least 4 years if I went to UCF, not to mention the "free money" Bright Futures offers requires that I stay in state another 4 years after that, so there goes my Master's degree AND first 2 years in the workforce. Even if I ended up in debt, at least there would be roughly 6 years of my life where I'd be HAPPY in my youth. Because I hate it here. Too many negative memories and traumatic experiences leaving a bad taste in my mouth. Plus the weather. All that alone is enough for me to leave this terrible place. It's time I made my own choices about my life, right?
On an unrelated note, my laptop STILL won't let me login to Blogger, so this is coming from me being done with day one of midterm exams on a school laptop. And my laptop won't let me login to Tumblr now either, but at least I have the app! Not the same though. Sigh.
As pleased/delighted/overjoyed/amazed as I am about my acceptance, I'm torn between them and DePaul, which I'm sure I said before. Of course I'm in love with Rochester and everything about it, but there's just something about the unknown of the third largest city in the country that's pulling me in. Like TJ, I WANT that city experience. The "famous" Metro is right by campus, and pretty much all my favorite bands play either there or close to it. Not to mention I started my Chicago obsession at the tender age of 12. Almost NO bands play in Rochester, maybe Buffalo but that's an hour out, and heaven forbid they skip all that and go straight to NYC six hours away. I'd die. Isn't FOB supposed to come off hiatus soon? Because when they do, I'll have to be there, and I can't go if a concert is on a weeknight and it's in NYC. A weeknight show in Chicago? So much easier. But I can't get over that feeling I had when I stepped on the UofR campus that first day summer of 2011. Love at first sight is the closest thing I can say to describe it.
It's all going to come down to money in the end. I get my Rochester projected aid packet before the new year, and that will make or break my early decision agreement. If they fall through, then DePaul, by default (ha), becomes my top against UCF as far as money is concerned. Sadly as much as I want to, I can't go into the myUCF account and click "decline" on the admission status page. And why? Because of money. What happens if I decline them now, or in a few weeks, and either UofR falls through or DePaul simply doesn't offer enough for me to handle decent loans? I'd be drowning in debt...but do I care? I'd be stuck here for at least 4 years if I went to UCF, not to mention the "free money" Bright Futures offers requires that I stay in state another 4 years after that, so there goes my Master's degree AND first 2 years in the workforce. Even if I ended up in debt, at least there would be roughly 6 years of my life where I'd be HAPPY in my youth. Because I hate it here. Too many negative memories and traumatic experiences leaving a bad taste in my mouth. Plus the weather. All that alone is enough for me to leave this terrible place. It's time I made my own choices about my life, right?
On an unrelated note, my laptop STILL won't let me login to Blogger, so this is coming from me being done with day one of midterm exams on a school laptop. And my laptop won't let me login to Tumblr now either, but at least I have the app! Not the same though. Sigh.
Monday, December 10, 2012
News!
IUD went in just fine. Definite pain during and a bit afterwards but here I am a week later and feeling back to normal completely. I'd say it was worth it.
But here's the real news! I got accepted into DePaul! And not only that but I received the top Dean's scholarship there for a total of $56,000, which is $14,000 per year for tuition. So, basically, that's nearly half tuition every year, leaving me with around $28,000 to come up with. But I'm confident in need-based aid to cover another part of that before loans come in.
I think Rochester has serious competition, because I'm falling in love with Chicago too. And speaking of who I signed my life away to, UofR sent out most of the early decision letters today, so I could hear by the end of the week. Well, really anywhere between 2-9 days from now. But still! Decision is coming, then financial aid notices for the whole picture.
I don't know what I'm more worried about: not being able to pay for it, the actual admission decision, or being able to pay. Crazy right? Guess I could always go to Chicago for graduate school, but it messes up future plans...who cares?!? I'm taking things one phase at a time.
Which brings me to TJ. After some fiasco while spending the holidays with him, we've decided to put a halt to the whole promise ring and definite future idea. I've never been a normal teen, and I'll never get that chance again. Maybe we're soulmates and will spend forever together and get married, but maybe we won't. Maybe we're just high school sweethearts and we haven't met "The One" yet. Or maybe we're each other's "One." I don't know. But we've talked a lot, and we have some fixing to do. Nothing's perfect. But it's falling into place.
Computer won't let me on Blogger so this is from my phone app, hence the general brevity of this post. There will be more admission updates as I hear back!
But here's the real news! I got accepted into DePaul! And not only that but I received the top Dean's scholarship there for a total of $56,000, which is $14,000 per year for tuition. So, basically, that's nearly half tuition every year, leaving me with around $28,000 to come up with. But I'm confident in need-based aid to cover another part of that before loans come in.
I think Rochester has serious competition, because I'm falling in love with Chicago too. And speaking of who I signed my life away to, UofR sent out most of the early decision letters today, so I could hear by the end of the week. Well, really anywhere between 2-9 days from now. But still! Decision is coming, then financial aid notices for the whole picture.
I don't know what I'm more worried about: not being able to pay for it, the actual admission decision, or being able to pay. Crazy right? Guess I could always go to Chicago for graduate school, but it messes up future plans...who cares?!? I'm taking things one phase at a time.
Which brings me to TJ. After some fiasco while spending the holidays with him, we've decided to put a halt to the whole promise ring and definite future idea. I've never been a normal teen, and I'll never get that chance again. Maybe we're soulmates and will spend forever together and get married, but maybe we won't. Maybe we're just high school sweethearts and we haven't met "The One" yet. Or maybe we're each other's "One." I don't know. But we've talked a lot, and we have some fixing to do. Nothing's perfect. But it's falling into place.
Computer won't let me on Blogger so this is from my phone app, hence the general brevity of this post. There will be more admission updates as I hear back!
Monday, December 3, 2012
Worries and Cares
Getting my IUD put in today. And I'm scared about it. Not as if I have a "feeling" something bad is going to happen or anything like that. I'm just mixed a little on the whole thing.
I know it's the right thing. 99.99% effective birth control with no hormones for ten years. Don't have to take a pill or a shot every so often. One time and I'm done. But it's an invasive procedure.
Doctor is going to have to dilate my cervix, like what happens in child birth but not to 10 cm. Still not fun, as there will be bad cramps. Then after he inserts it and places it making sure it's perfect I'll have bleeding and cramping for up to a month after.
But wait there's more! If I don't check the strings (not as long as a tampon string but they're there) and make sure they're the same length, the device could fall out and become ineffective or be free-range in my uterus and fuck it up so bad I'll become infertile. That doesn't happen to the majority of people but it could still happen.
Like I said I'm not legitimately worried, if I were I would have cancelled my appointment. But the benefits certainly outweigh the risks. It wouldn't be the recommended form of birth control for teens if they didn't. It's like how I got with my tattoo: there was a chance I'd be allergic to the ink or the needle vibrations, or I would get an infection or something. But none of that happened.
Guess this is my first real part of growing up. Making adult decisions and all that. But a little academic win for last week: 100% on my financial math quiz, tied for highest grade on my history test, and beat TJ on our biology test on ecology.
I know it's the right thing. 99.99% effective birth control with no hormones for ten years. Don't have to take a pill or a shot every so often. One time and I'm done. But it's an invasive procedure.
Doctor is going to have to dilate my cervix, like what happens in child birth but not to 10 cm. Still not fun, as there will be bad cramps. Then after he inserts it and places it making sure it's perfect I'll have bleeding and cramping for up to a month after.
But wait there's more! If I don't check the strings (not as long as a tampon string but they're there) and make sure they're the same length, the device could fall out and become ineffective or be free-range in my uterus and fuck it up so bad I'll become infertile. That doesn't happen to the majority of people but it could still happen.
Like I said I'm not legitimately worried, if I were I would have cancelled my appointment. But the benefits certainly outweigh the risks. It wouldn't be the recommended form of birth control for teens if they didn't. It's like how I got with my tattoo: there was a chance I'd be allergic to the ink or the needle vibrations, or I would get an infection or something. But none of that happened.
Guess this is my first real part of growing up. Making adult decisions and all that. But a little academic win for last week: 100% on my financial math quiz, tied for highest grade on my history test, and beat TJ on our biology test on ecology.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)